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Eddy Ed Kevin And Rolf's Excellent Adventure
One day in the cul-de-sac, Kevin and Rolf approached Ed and Eddy with a request.. "Hey, dorks! We need you for something!" Kevin barked. "Hey, Lord Shovelchin! That's too bad." Eddy replied and redirected his gaze to the blueprints of his next scam. "Kevin..!" Rolf urged. "Ugh. Um. We could really use your.. help, 'PLEASE'?" he corrected himself. "What's up, fellas?" Ed asked. "We have this homework assignment and it's pretty heavy stuff. We could use a couple more heads and hands." "Yes!" Rolf followed, "Double-clever-boy and California-dreaming-Murray are no longer an option, please help Rolf and his foolish white bread overcome this obstacle!" "..Right." Kevin continued, "School's killing us with this extra work, cause I'm always on the football field and Rolf is.. Rolf." "Rolf certainly is Rolf!" Ed smiled absentmindedly. "Yeah, and so we gotta take what we can get if we wanna graduate." "Ok, but, like, you could ask anyone that isn't us." Eddy said with a disinterested tone. "The way things are going now, the cul-de-sac is gonna get cleared out and there'll be no one left to ask for anything. Double D's gone, Murray's gone, who knows when you dorks are outta here.." "Hey, it's not like Double D left by choice, ya know..!" Eddy replied, "Is that all he was to you; a homework slave?" "Yeah, and he was yours too!" "Touché." Ed nodded. "I respected the dude fine enough, he was definitely better than you two." Kevin added, "Nazz married him, that says enough, really.." "Yeah, totally weak, she should've married me!" Eddy grumbled, "Double D didn't even wanna get married." "Spiteful-table-head-Eddy, this is not what we came for!" Rolf intercepted, "Will you assist Rolf and his arched-bellied friend or not?" "What do you need from us, you know our grades aren't that great." "We have to write about the Titanic." Kevin answered. Eddy paused. "That's it? Go to the library!" he snarled and went back to his blueprints, "I got better things to do!" "You think we'd go to YOU if it wasn't serious?" Kevin fired back, "Why embarrass ourselves like that!" "You're asking help writing a report on something a kazillion kids before you have done. Do ya even got a brain in that flat head of yours or did it all drop down into your chin?" "Yeah!" Ed agreed, "Asking us is dumb, cause me and Eddy are dumb, only a dummy would ask us!" "Um.. I'm not THAT dumb." Eddy muttered. "Ok. Then prove it." Kevin grinned deviously, "If this job's so easy, then even YOU could do it.. right?" "Y-Yeah?" "Yeah? Hmm. Sounds like you're not sure, though.." he shrugged tauntingly and turned around, "Guess we gotta ask around at the trailer park, Rolf, the folks over there are probably geniuses compared to these two, we're wasting our time here." "O-Oh yeah?!" Eddy shouted, as he jumped up, "If we're so dumb, could we make this TIME MACHINE?" Eddy flipped around the blueprints in his hands and proudly showed them to Rolf and Kevin. They tried to contain their laughter when they saw the cheap drawings and cartoon logic portrayed. The plans looked like they came from a Tom & Jerry cartoon. "Yo dork.." Kevin began, "..Um.. This super legit time machine.. is for a scam you're planning on doing later, right?" "Maybe?" he answered. "So, that means it's fake." "Huh, n-no, not necessarily!" "Yeah, it is, cause you never make anything legit for your scams. That's why it's a scam." "This is the real deal!" "There is truth in this truth, Prince of Fools." Rolf spoke, "We cannot use your box with lightbulbs for this task!" "How it looks doesn't matter!" Eddy grumbled, "It's about what we use to rip open time!" "That's right!" Ed chimed in, "This is for real and we're gonna use it to get Doub-" "Puh, forget about it, Ed!" Eddy interrupted him, "Guys like these need to see to believe! Let's build this thing and show em!" Ed and Eddy ran off, whereafter Kevin and Rolf looked at each other. They had nothing to say about the absurdity they just witnessed. They definitely regretted asking them, but were prepared for it to a degree. It's not like Ed and Eddy were their first choice, there simply was no one left to ask. They were willing to settle for anyone. Their report had to have a minimum of 200 pages and was due next week, they needed hands to help write this thing, and fast. "And I was going to pay them, too.." Kevin lamented, "Dorks." "Forget about it, we cannot wait for the creation of their joke box, let us start on this painful journey without the Ed-boys!" Rolf concluded. "I guess, might as well." But before they could take their first step, Ed and Eddy had already returned, dragging along a big telephone booth on a small red wagon. "Ha! Done already, whaddaya think about that!" Eddy yelled triumphantly. "Huh?!" Kevin huffed. "That blue cage looks familiar to Rolf.." Rolf commented. "Where'd you get that, dorks!" "It was just standing there, at the side of the road!" said Ed cheerfully, "Better than carton, right?" "Duuude.. you two are gonna get arrested." "We're just borrowing it!" Eddy hastily proclaimed, "We'll bring it back when we're done! Havin' that said.. get in, fellas!" "Hmyeah, I'm not getting in." Kevin replied, "This is dumb, I don't want to be seen in this." "Don't worry, it'll work!" Ed said, "Double D made the engine back when and we taped it inside the booth!" "What? SO DOUBLE DWEEB MADE THE TIME MACHINE!" "Don't call him Double Dweeb!" Eddy snarled and kicked Kevin in the back of the head, "..But yes. And we've used this baby before, we know it works!" "Pfft! You three time travelled?" he scoffed, rubbing his sore head, "Sounds like a horrible premise." "If you don't believe me, why not get in and let yourself be convinced..?" Eddy said confidently, while slapping the metal side of his freshly stolen telephone booth like a sleazy car salesman. Kevin looked around and sighed. What was there to lose, they already made a fool out of themselves by standing next to the thing. Ed, Eddy, Kevin and Rolf stepped inside, and closed the door. "I'm cramped.." Ed complained. "Yeah, already regretting it." Kevin sighed. "SO! The Titanic..!" Eddy shouted over them, "..When did this boat go down?" "April 14th, 1912, on the North Atlantic Ocean!" "If you know all this without using a cheat paper, why're you here?" "Go already!" Eddy used the buttons on the control panel, and surely, the environment outside started to change. Ed and Eddy looked unfazed by it all, but their guests were staring their eyes out. It worked. "And there we go, we're on the Titanic, the day it sunk!" Eddy announced with his chest puffed out. The screaming people outside their booth indeed made it seem that way. "So.." Kevin said, "We're on a ship that's about to go under in freezing water..?" "Yes!" "YOU BROUGHT US TO THE EXACT MOMENT HUNDREDS OF PEOPLE DIED?!" "Um.. you two better start writing if you wanna finish that repo-" "Dork, you better believe we're going back home!" Kevin shrieked, "Right now!" The ship started to fall vertically, causing most of the booth's windows to break and the boys getting launched out. They were now in the middle of the whole ruckus and had trouble getting back to the machine. The ship's vibrations kept dropping it further down to the other side, and everyone tried to hold onto whatever they could grab in order not to meet the same fate. "What now, Eddy!" Ed cried. "I-I dunno! Go to the life boats? We'll figure things out later!" "They won't let you on!" a man next to them sobbed, "Priority is given to women and young children, there aren't enough boats! They've already denied me and my father!" "This is messed up, man..!" Kevin complained, "If we ever reach that time machine, c-can't we come back to save these guys with it?" "Definitely not the whole ship!" Eddy answered, while clinging onto dear life, "We only have a few bottles of gas for the engine and Double D made em..! We don't know what the ingredients are!" "Everyone!" Rolf nervously intervened, "Rolf suggests we save ourselves first and go to our time travel device before it's swallowed by the icy lips of Mother Ocean!" "How? Should we d-drop ourselves down?" Ed asked. "Yes, it is the only way, chinless-Ed-boy!" Rolf replied, "We aim for the box and slide down! Now is the time!" "I hope the thing still works..!" Eddy moaned to himself. The four boys released their grip and slid down with frightening speed. When things seemingly went out of control, they grabbed hold and guided each other towards the flipped time machine. They quickly jumped inside and Eddy typed in the new coordinates. The booth zapped itself out of existence and reappeared in their trusty cul-de-sac home, whereafter it collapsed. "..I guess a phone booth isn't strong enough to time travel with." Eddy remarked, "We'll have to find something else next time, Ed." "Ok.." "If you know what's good for you and the world, there won't be a next time!!! This was SICK!" Kevin shouted, "Thanks for traumatizing me, dorks!" Rolf and Kevin walked off with trembling legs and leaned on each other's shoulders exhaustedly. Eddy turned Ed. "Did.. he just say this was sick?" "Yeah, he had a swell time, apparently?" "What a freak." ''The End '' Category:Fan-Fiction Category:Fanfiction Category:Fan-Fiction Episodes